2. Selectively exercise cmake `-DPYBIND11_TEST_OVERRIDE`: ubuntu, macos, windows

Extra work added to quick jobs, based on timings below, to not increase the GHA start-to-last-job-finished time.

```
Duration
^              Number of pytest runs
^              ^ Job identifier
^              ^ ^
0:03:48.024227 1 1___3___Clang_3.6___C++11___x64.txt
0:03:58.992814 1 2___3___Clang_3.7___C++11___x64.txt
0:04:25.758942 1 1___3.7___Debian___x86____Install.txt
0:04:50.148276 1 4___3___Clang_7___C++11___x64.txt
0:04:55.784558 1 13___3___Clang_15___C++20___x64.txt
0:04:57.048754 1 6___3___Clang_dev___C++11___x64.txt
0:05:00.485181 1 7___3___Clang_5___C++14___x64.txt
0:05:03.744964 1 2___3___almalinux8___x64.txt
0:05:06.222752 1 5___3___Clang_9___C++11___x64.txt
0:05:11.767022 1 2___3___GCC_7___C++17__x64.txt
0:05:18.634930 1 2___3.11__deadsnakes____x64.txt
0:05:22.810995 1 1___3___GCC_7___C++11__x64.txt
0:05:25.275317 1 12___3___Clang_14___C++20___x64.txt
0:05:32.058174 1 5___3___GCC_10___C++17__x64.txt
0:05:39.381351 1 7___3___GCC_12___C++20__x64.txt
0:05:40.502252 1 8___3___Clang_10___C++17___x64.txt
0:05:59.344905 1 3___3___Clang_3.9___C++11___x64.txt
0:06:10.825147 1 6___3___GCC_11___C++20__x64.txt
0:06:20.655443 1 3___3___almalinux9___x64.txt
0:06:22.472061 1 3___3___GCC_8___C++14__x64.txt
0:06:42.647406 1 11___3___Clang_13___C++20___x64.txt
0:06:53.352720 1 1___3.10___CUDA_11.7___Ubuntu_22.04.txt
0:07:07.357801 1 2___3.7___MSVC_2019___x86_-DCMAKE_CXX_STANDARD=14.txt
0:07:09.057603 1 1___3___centos7___x64.txt
0:07:15.546282 1 1___3.8___MSVC_2019__Debug____x86_-DCMAKE_CXX_STANDARD=17.txt
0:07:22.566022 1 4___3___GCC_8___C++17__x64.txt
0:08:13.592674 1 2___3.9___MSVC_2019__Debug____x86_-DCMAKE_CXX_STANDARD=20.txt
0:08:16.422768 1 9___3___Clang_11___C++20___x64.txt
0:08:21.168457 1 3___3.8___MSVC_2019___x86_-DCMAKE_CXX_STANDARD=17.txt
0:08:27.129468 1 10___3___Clang_12___C++20___x64.txt
0:09:35.045470 1 1___3.10___windows-latest___clang-latest.txt
0:09:57.361843 1 1___3.9___MSVC_2022_C++20___x64.txt
0:10:35.187767 1 1___3.6___MSVC_2019___x86.txt
0:11:14.691200 4 2___3.9___ubuntu-20.04___x64.txt
0:11:37.701167 1 1_macos-latest___brew_install_llvm.txt
0:11:38.688299 4 4___3.11___ubuntu-20.04___x64.txt
0:11:52.720216 1 4___3.9___MSVC_2019___x86_-DCMAKE_CXX_STANDARD=20.txt
0:13:23.456591 4 6___pypy-3.8___ubuntu-20.04___x64_-DPYBIND11_FINDPYTHON=ON.txt
0:13:25.863592 2 1___3___ICC_latest___x64.txt
0:13:32.411758 3 9___3.9___windows-2022___x64.txt
0:13:45.473377 4 3___3.10___ubuntu-20.04___x64.txt
0:13:55.366447 4 5___pypy-3.7___ubuntu-20.04___x64.txt
0:13:57.969502 3 10___3.10___windows-2022___x64.txt
0:14:19.837475 3 11___3.11___windows-2022___x64.txt
0:14:33.316770 4 1___3.6___ubuntu-20.04___x64_-DPYBIND11_FINDPYTHON=ON_-DCMA.txt
0:15:34.449278 4 22___3.6___windows-2019___x64_-DPYBIND11_FINDPYTHON=ON.txt
0:16:25.189055 2 1___3.9-dbg__deadsnakes____Valgrind___x64.txt
0:17:20.956667 4 15___3.6___macos-latest___x64.txt
0:17:27.513891 4 23___3.9___windows-2019___x64.txt
0:17:58.783286 3 8___3.6___windows-2022___x64.txt
0:18:25.917828 4 7___pypy-3.9___ubuntu-20.04___x64.txt
0:19:17.399820 3 13___pypy-3.8___windows-2022___x64.txt
0:19:45.002122 3 12___pypy-3.7___windows-2022___x64.txt
0:20:03.201926 4 16___3.9___macos-latest___x64.txt
0:20:15.415178 4 17___3.10___macos-latest___x64.txt
0:20:20.263216 4 20___pypy-3.8___macos-latest___x64.txt
0:20:31.998226 3 1___3___windows-latest___mingw64.txt
0:20:40.812286 4 18___3.11___macos-latest___x64.txt
0:22:47.714749 4 19___pypy-3.7___macos-latest___x64.txt
0:23:04.435859 3 2___3___windows-latest___mingw32.txt
0:25:48.719597 3 14___pypy-3.9___windows-2022___x64.txt
0:26:01.211688 4 21___pypy-3.9___macos-latest___x64.txt
0:28:19.971015 1 1___3___CentOS7__PGI_22.9___x64.txt
```

To support the use case captured in the new test_vector_unique_ptr_member.cpp

Bumps [jwlawson/actions-setup-cmake](https://github.com/jwlawson/actions-setup-cmake) from 1.13 to 1.14.
- [Release notes](https://github.com/jwlawson/actions-setup-cmake/releases)
- [Commits](https://github.com/jwlawson/actions-setup-cmake/compare/v1.13...v1.14

)

---
updated-dependencies:
- dependency-name: jwlawson/actions-setup-cmake
  dependency-type: direct:production
  update-type: version-update:semver-minor
...

Signed-off-by: dependabot[bot] <support@github.com>
Co-authored-by: dependabot[bot] <49699333+dependabot[bot]@users.noreply.github.com>

Bumps [pypa/gh-action-pypi-publish](https://github.com/pypa/gh-action-pypi-publish) from 1.8.4 to 1.8.5.
- [Release notes](https://github.com/pypa/gh-action-pypi-publish/releases)
- [Commits](https://github.com/pypa/gh-action-pypi-publish/compare/v1.8.4...v1.8.5

)

---
updated-dependencies:
- dependency-name: pypa/gh-action-pypi-publish
  dependency-type: direct:production
  update-type: version-update:semver-patch
...

Signed-off-by: dependabot[bot] <support@github.com>
Co-authored-by: dependabot[bot] <49699333+dependabot[bot]@users.noreply.github.com>

Bumps [pypa/gh-action-pypi-publish](https://github.com/pypa/gh-action-pypi-publish) from 1.8.3 to 1.8.4.
- [Release notes](https://github.com/pypa/gh-action-pypi-publish/releases)
- [Commits](https://github.com/pypa/gh-action-pypi-publish/compare/v1.8.3...v1.8.4

)

---
updated-dependencies:
- dependency-name: pypa/gh-action-pypi-publish
  dependency-type: direct:production
  update-type: version-update:semver-patch
...

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* ci: Python 3.12 optional testing

Signed-off-by: Henry Schreiner <henryschreineriii@gmail.com>

* Skip test_flaky_exception_failure_point_init() for Python 3.12.0a6 (similar to https://github.com/google/pywrapcc/commit/af5c6536aba77b1db99bb16995d3a684351efb93#diff-f46006e3f43ffb1dd5d6862005427f6620f4dcfb1fa2f883d8482550069eeecc

).

* Disable tests/test_embed/test_interpreter.cpp (broken with Python 3.12.0alpha6)

```
free(): invalid pointer

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
test_embed is a Catch v2.13.9 host application.
Run with -? for options

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Custom PyConfig
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
/home/runner/work/pybind11/pybind11/tests/test_embed/test_interpreter.cpp:175
...............................................................................

/home/runner/work/pybind11/pybind11/tests/test_embed/test_interpreter.cpp:179: FAILED:
  {Unknown expression after the reported line}
due to a fatal error condition:
  SIGABRT - Abort (abnormal termination) signal

===============================================================================
test cases:    6 |    5 passed | 1 failed
assertions: 1518 | 1517 passed | 1 failed
```

---------

Signed-off-by: Henry Schreiner <henryschreineriii@gmail.com>
Co-authored-by: Ralf W. Grosse-Kunstleve <rwgk@google.com>

* Introduce `get_python_state_dict()`

* Conditional version bump for Python 3.12+

* Shuffle subexpressions to make the condition easier to understand (no change to logic).

* Make pybind11 ABI version 5 the minimum for Python 3.12+ (as suggested by @Lalaland)

* Add back condition for PYPY_VERSION, but keep it open for future PyPy versions.

* Fall back to simple `|| defined(PYPY_VERSION)`. `PY_VERSION_HEX` does not appear to be meaningful with PyPy.

* bugfix: allow noexcept lambdas in CPP17. Fix #4565

* Remove unused code from test case

* Fix clang-tidy error

* Address reviewer comment

use C++17 syntax to get rid of recursive template instantiations for concatenating type signatures (#4587)

Bumps [pypa/gh-action-pypi-publish](https://github.com/pypa/gh-action-pypi-publish) from 1.8.1 to 1.8.3.
- [Release notes](https://github.com/pypa/gh-action-pypi-publish/releases)
- [Commits](https://github.com/pypa/gh-action-pypi-publish/compare/v1.8.1...v1.8.3

)

---
updated-dependencies:
- dependency-name: pypa/gh-action-pypi-publish
  dependency-type: direct:production
  update-type: version-update:semver-patch
...

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* docs: changelog for 2.10.4

Signed-off-by: Henry Schreiner <henryschreineriii@gmail.com>

* Apply suggestions from code review

* Update docs/changelog.rst

---------

Signed-off-by: Henry Schreiner <henryschreineriii@gmail.com>

Remove test code that does not exercise anything in pybind11, but breaks between Python 3.12alpha3 (still working) and 3.12alpha6 (broken): (#4559)

```
str(OrderedDict([(1, "a"), (2, "b")]))
```

Old:
```
OrderedDict([(1, 'a'), (2, 'b')])
```

New:
```
OrderedDict({1: 'a', 2: 'b'})
```

See also: https://github.com/python/cpython/issues/101446

updates:
- [github.com/charliermarsh/ruff-pre-commit: v0.0.251 → v0.0.254](https://github.com/charliermarsh/ruff-pre-commit/compare/v0.0.251...v0.0.254)
- [github.com/PyCQA/pylint: v2.16.1 → v2.16.4](https://github.com/PyCQA/pylint/compare/v2.16.1...v2.16.4)
- [github.com/pre-commit/mirrors-mypy: v0.991 → v1.0.1](https://github.com/pre-commit/mirrors-mypy/compare/v0.991...v1.0.1

)

Co-authored-by: pre-commit-ci[bot] <66853113+pre-commit-ci[bot]@users.noreply.github.com>

Without this, it's impossible to get feature parity between detection
mechanisms. Both the pkg-config file and the cmake config set their
versions, but the python probe script didn't provide an option for this.

So you could print the compiler flags for using it, but you could not
check what you got.

This comment is unrelated to having T in tparam or not.
Probably a typo.
Copied the correct one here.

Resolve https://github.com/pybind/pybind11/issues/4518

Signed-off-by: Henry Schreiner <henryschreineriii@gmail.com>

Background: https://github.com/pybind/pybind11/pull/4285#issuecomment-1435066554

```
flake8...................................................................Failed
- hook id: flake8
- exit code: 1

pybind11/setup_helpers.py:177:13: B028 No explicit stacklevel keyword argument found. The warn method from the warnings module uses a stacklevel of 1 by default. This will only show a stack trace for the line on which the warn method is called. It is therefore recommended to use a stacklevel of 2 or greater to provide more information to the user.
            warnings.warn("You cannot safely change the cxx_level after setting it!")
            ^
```

* Revert "Go back to CMake 3.25.2 (#4496)"

This reverts commit b8f28551.

* Apply patch provided by @bradking (with pre-commit cmake-format auto fixes).

https://github.com/pybind/pybind11/pull/4503#issuecomment-1424768172

Signed-off-by: Henry Schreiner <henryschreineriii@gmail.com>

* Always display python type information in cast errors

* Address comments

* Update comment

This reverts commit b2c1978c.

See #4500 for background.

updates:
- [github.com/PyCQA/pylint: v2.16.0 → v2.16.1](https://github.com/PyCQA/pylint/compare/v2.16.0...v2.16.1

)

Co-authored-by: pre-commit-ci[bot] <66853113+pre-commit-ci[bot]@users.noreply.github.com>

* Keep registered types until after Py_Finalize(). Fix #4459

* Address reviewer comments

Bumps [ilammy/msvc-dev-cmd](https://github.com/ilammy/msvc-dev-cmd) from 1.12.0 to 1.12.1.
- [Release notes](https://github.com/ilammy/msvc-dev-cmd/releases)
- [Commits](https://github.com/ilammy/msvc-dev-cmd/compare/v1.12.0...v1.12.1

)

---
updated-dependencies:
- dependency-name: ilammy/msvc-dev-cmd
  dependency-type: direct:production
  update-type: version-update:semver-patch
...

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Signed-off-by: Henry Schreiner <henryschreineriii@gmail.com>

* Use PyConfig_InitPythonConfig instead of PyConfig_InitIsolatedConfig

* add unit test for default python configuration

---------

Co-authored-by: Daniel Jacobs <daniel.jacobs@is4s.com>

* Resolve flake8 error by replacing `pytest.raises(Exception)` with `SystemError`

* Also remove the obsolete comment.

* Tweak comment instead of removing it.

* Make sure to properly untrack gc objects before freeing them

* style: pre-commit fixes

* Fix lint

* Add comment about where the original track comes from

Co-authored-by: pre-commit-ci[bot] <66853113+pre-commit-ci[bot]@users.noreply.github.com>

Signed-off-by: Henry Schreiner <henryschreineriii@gmail.com>