build: move to `npm ci` where possible

Recent events (involving a maliciously published version of a popular
module's dependency) have reinvigorated my interest in seeing us move to
`npm ci` instead of `npm install`. This moves us to `npm ci` where
possible in Makefile and vcbuild.bat.

PR-URL: https://github.com/nodejs/node/pull/21802


Reviewed-By: Tiancheng "Timothy" Gu <timothygu99@gmail.com>
Reviewed-By: Richard Lau <riclau@uk.ibm.com>
Reviewed-By: Refael Ackermann <refack@gmail.com>
Reviewed-By: James M Snell <jasnell@gmail.com>