n-api: add code parameter to error helpers

In support of the effort to add error codes to all errors
generated by Node.js, add an optional code parameter to the
helper functions used to throw/create errors in N-API.

Backport-PR-URL: https://github.com/nodejs/node/pull/19447
PR-URL: https://github.com/nodejs/node/pull/13988
Fixes: https://github.com/nodejs/node/issues/13933


Reviewed-By: James M Snell <jasnell@gmail.com>
Reviewed-By: Anna Henningsen <anna@addaleax.net>