[InstCombine] remove uses before deleting instructions (PR43723)

This is a less ambitious alternative to previous attempts to fix
this bug with:
rG56b2aee1
rGef02831f
rG56b2aee1
...because those all failed bot testing with use-after-free or
other problems.

The original crashing/assert problem is still showing up on
various fuzzers, so I've added a new minimal test based on
another one of those failures.

Instead of trying to manage and coordinate the logic in
isAllocSiteRemovable() with the deletion loops, just loosen
the existing code that handles casts and GEP by replacing
with undef to allow other opcodes. That means that no
instructions with uses should assert on deletion, and there
are hopefully no non-obvious sanitizer bugs induced.